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THE MEDIOCRE BAKERY

killer plant-based treats

Find us at the Halifax Brewery Market, Saturdays 8-1!

1496 Lower Water Street

Halifax, Nova Scotia

Canada

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(cover photo by Jamie Kronick, check out @jamiekronick or jamiekronick.com)

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Home: Welcome
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SOME OF OUR TREATS

Our unusual offerings make no health claims. 

Except being vegan, it's all vegan.

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See our current selection by clicking the 'order now' button!

Home: Top Sellers
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SERIOUS CINNAMON ROLLS

Our reimagined cinnamon roll is our most popular creation. An impossible number of layers, rich and wonderful .. for some. 
"My cinnamon rolls taste better and don't break the bank!"   -- a disgruntled passerby sporting a full late-80's era track suit. 

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RICH CHOCOLATE ROLLS

This thinly-rolled chocolate wheel is rich with cocoa and happiness. Similar to a classic chocolate Babka, for those who know Seinfeld. 
"Honestly, it was too big. I ate the whole thing in about five minutes and it just ruined my day. Make them smaller." -- dude who looked like Steven Seagal, complete with karate outfit. 

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SPINACH & MARINARA ROLL

A giant, plush, savoury roll with basil, oregano, tons of fresh spinach and rich tomato sauce. Topped with lots of course salt. A Saturday morning staple for those who enjoy a classic pizza-ish flavour. 
"It seems almost raw inside. Do you know what you're doing?"  --  dude in leather with Sailor Moon face tattoos

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GREEN OLIVE TAPENADE ROLL

A popular bun, rolled with juicy green olives, garlic, lemon and pimento. Plush and salty. 
"GREEN olive tapenade? Ridiculous. Good luck with that."  --  Cruise ship passenger wearing American flag-embroidered denim. Jeans AND vest. 

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CARAMELIZED ONION ROLL

Slow-caramelized, sweet-and-salty onions coat this soft, savoury bun. Aromatic and plush. 
"Ugh. Onions are super-gross." -- unkempt child with sticky fingers 

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COCONUT MANGO ROLL

This soft, sweet roll (although not as sweet as the cinnamon or chocolate rolls) made with long shredded coconut and alfonzo mango is pull-apart goodness. 
"Coconut is disgusting. It's a texture thing. And mangos? Isn't this supposed to be local? Where is the mango farm in Nova Scotia?"  --  Regular customer, Spring 2019

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PEKING TOFU ROLL

Sweet hoisin sauce, sesame and cilantro make this (moist - sorry) savoury treat a personal fav. This is the roll I eat on the way home from market, after 30 waking hours. 
"Cilantro? Go F**k yourself" -- about 14% of the population

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RED BEAN BUN

A dim sum classic reimagined with a plush doughy base and a generous filling of sweet red bean puree. 
"I don't think you'll attract the masses with beans, Michael." 
-- my mother

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CHOCOLATE BABKA

The legendary pull-apart loaf, braided with exceptional Belgian chocolate, topped with sea salt.  Share with friends and family, or eat it alone. You do you. 


"Ten bucks! I'm not paying ten bucks for this!" 

                                - The Dude (The Big Lebowski) lookalike, after reaching over the sneeze guard and grabbing a whole babka with his bare hands.


True story.

Home: Opening Hours

WHERE TO FIND US

Halifax Brewery Market
1496 Lower Water St
Halifax, NS

Saturday
8-1

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CONTACT US

Halifax Brewery Market
1496 Lower Water St
Saturday, 8-1

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